For months now I have struggled with this feeling of really wanting to quit but not knowing what that means to me, my colleagues and the boss. The organization will always be alright, they will just advertise the position and find a quick replacement.
As someone who has worked on both sides I am guessing the biggest fear is the security or lack thereof. When you get used to this employment setup it makes you fear the struggle. It makes you weak and afraid of facing the world out there as a man. I was once fearless, entrepreneurial and always coming up with new ideas. Right now I feel like all I do is respond to requests, I am not allowed to create, critique or even conceptualize. It feels like prison, I may never have seen the insides of a guarded prison but am pretty sure this is what lack of freedom looks like.
To all those friends of mine out there who managed to make the leap, how did you do it? How did you overcome the fear of the unknown and the hurdle of the comforts that come with a salary at the end of the month. A very good one for that matter. Am pretty sure my fellow young people out there will read it and wonder what the hell is wrong with me. They will probably say God blesses those who don’t see their blessings. And to some extent they may be right. If I woke up today and quit my job to pursue my dreams my family would be the one to call me crazy.
One thing is for sure, when I decided to leave the business world albeit partially and join the employment route I was at a crossroads with myself and my choice of a career. I was a young man full of desire, with creative juices flowing freely and with no fear of anything. I had with me the vibrance of my youth and the vision of a sailor believing that storytelling would be my source of bread. Don’t get me wrong storytelling is what got me the job I have today. It’s what’s taken me all over the world and shown me what a beautiful experience life can hand you if only you believe in your abilities. But now I am back to where I was a few years back. Conflicted, at a crossroads and at war with myself. I feel sick. I feel lost, but also harbor some fear of what is to come if I choose to jump ship.
So this morning, my good friends, I ask, When is it time to face your fears? When do you write that letter and face yourself and allow the inner you to freely express themselves? When is it the right time to quit your job and follow your true passion? Am waiting for your answers even as I debate within myself on the best way to go about this. But until then let me work on this presentation.